Thursday, August 21, 2008

Checklist for ladies.

Check List to check if your dude is an asshole

First,to clear the misconception that handsome dudes are all arseholes,and butt-ugly dudes have a heart of gold,I have came across a few incidents when the handsome dude is infact extremely nice(no,I am not talking about myself here) while the butt-ugly guy has a character even more butt-ugly than his face,if that is possible.

I know it is rather hard for ladies to judge if a man is an arsehole, so I decided to aid you girls by coming out with a checklist!

1)He has verbally assaulted you.I know it is hard to judge if a man has verbally assaulted u.
Remember "Darling,the dress is 1 size too small for you" doesn't count as verbal assault.
Verbal assault is "Hey PIGGY,go roll in the mud and don't waste my money on that dress."
The tone of his voice is important also.

2)He likes to shrink away from his responsibilities.If he couldn't be counted on to take care of himself,or his promise to you,what happens if you get shotgunned?

3)He likes to flirt around.Harmless random flirting is fine,but not those flirting that lead to him sleeping on a friend's bed.That,is not flirting,it is cheating.

4)He always say he will change,promising you the sky and the moon,but as we all know,a leopard will never change his spots,and Jessica Alba is forever the most beautiful woman in the entire universe.

5)He make you cry.Not due to you being touched by what he has done for you.Nor the kind of korean drama situation when he is dying from a wasting disease and you are by his bed crying your eyes out and suddenly,news came to you that he is infact....your twin brother that has been seperated at birth from you.NO.Not that also.

Rather,he make you feel hurt in your heart,and despair.A real man will never make a woman he loves cry.Infact,a real man will never make any woman cry.

6)Physical assault.Yeah,physical abuse,if you suffered physical abuse,immediately kick that son-of-the-bitch out of your life.A man that hits a woman is no man at all.Vice versa also for the sake of beaten up husbands everywhere.

7)Edison Chen.He is emulating what Edison Chen did to the poor girls.Lets hope he didn't share the pictures around.Any man that does that,frankly,be very careful,you have no idea what he is gonna do with the pictures.

8)His refusal to give you his last mouth of Ben and Jerry.....

Important fact here,to see if a dude is a good man,all you need to do is to zao geng infront of him.There is 3 kind of scenories.

1)His avoidence to look in your direction and attempts to block u for outsider views,or he warn you about your 'opps'. <---This is one of the best guy ever.

2)He keep stealing glances,not telling you anything,but enjoying the magnificent view you are providing for him,sometimes showing hint of a small smile..<-----Gone case,this guy,has gone to the dogs.

3)He looks at you,mouth open so widely that 2 mosquitos can fly in and do an aerial loop.<-----For this situation,I have to apologise for the poor dude.It is your beauty and radiance that dissolved his mind into a blubbering mess.He could be actually a rather nice guy,but for that moment,his reasoning has turned to mush,he can't concentrate on anything else due to the one serious flaw god did when he created men.

He gave man two heads but only enough blood to operate a single head each time.


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